Tag: First Nations

Miss Myrtle’s Rectal Cranial Impaction Hall of Fame Part 8

Illegitimi non carborundum – Don’t Let the Bastards Grind You Down

Bugs and Daffy Around Campfire

Here for your edification and enjoyment are yet more Inductees into the Rectal Cranial Impaction Hall of Fame. These are the folks who leave us dumbfounded, dumbstruck and dumbfucked, in no particular order:

DISCLAIMERS: Any picture/Inductee duplication is purely intentional. You may also notice that the majority of Inductees are men. Dearies, that should require no further explanation. This blog post includes text and photos…because a picture is worth a thousand words.

SPECIAL THANKS to Colonel Morris Davis, former Guantanamo Chief Prosecutor for creating the phrase Rectal Cranial Impaction

OMG, Iowa Caucuses are really over and the “Our liberties we prize and our rights we will maintain” folks have spoken. Firstly, let me say that as a Canadian, this is one of the things I love about American politics. It is messy, it is exasperating, entertaining and for the most part, it is all out there. We Canucks are more politically anally retentive as demonstrated by the former fascist Stephen Harper government, which shut down all national debate and discussion…but I digress.

Donald Trump

Cirque Du Toupee was handed a humiliating defeat at the hands of Ted Cruz.  Showing fake humility when conceding, Donald Trump reverted to form in a relentless and hysterical twitter rant the next morning calling Cruz a liar and cheat, and demanding a do-over. Revealed for the sniveling whiner that he is, Cirque Du Toupee is heading for implosion. and its going to be UGE! Ted Cruz, that picture-perfect Tea Party evangelical prays to a GOP Jesus who is so hateful it is embarrassing. Perhaps he comes by that genetically.  Cruz’s father Rafael is a Cuban emigre and RWNJ evangelical preacher who encourages congregants to “tithe mightily”. Speaking of tithing mightily, Ted is married to Heidi Cruz, a Goldman Sachs investment manager. Needless to say. Goldman Sachs has been a big Cruz Campaign supporter. Add the fact that Ted is mucho unpopular in Congress and out, and he fits in perfectly into the GOP Clown Car.

Donald Tump Toon Varvel   Ted Cruz

Uncle Ben Carson DID NOT QUIT THE RACE but has yet to show up in New Hampshire. Apparently he flew to Florida because he needs a change of clothes, a nap and Plan B. Oh, and he’s furious with Ted Cruz…whose campaign apparently spread rumors that he had quit. Honestly Dearies, I can’t make this stuff up and it truly isn’t brain surgery. The GOP and GOP Clown Car are indeed The Gift That Keeps On Giving.

Ben Carson

Here in Beautiful British Columbia, Conservative-In-Liberal-Clothing Christy Clark posed for yet another cheesy photo op after FINALLY being dragged kicking and screaming to sign legislation to preserve our Great Bear Rain Forest and the iconic Spirit Bear. First Nations, for whom the Rain Forest has been home for thousands of years, are also its guardians. As part of the Rainforest Solutions Project, they have relentlessly pursued The Great Bear Rainforest Order on our behalf. See the link to Elizabeth McSheffrey‘s excellent article in the National Observer, below. You know an election is on the horizon next year, because taking a page from the Fourth Reich & Stephen Harper playbook, warm fuzzy TV ads are playing relentlessly, telling us how wonderfully Christy has NOT been doing for BC children and families…The Bigger The Lie

Great Bear RainForest

WTF is up with the NFL? They are still partnered with that paragon of slave labor Papa John’s Pizza for the Super Bowl. Papa John’s Owner John Schnatter was successfully sued by New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, for amongst other things, wage theft. Shame on NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell & Co. Methinks we probably won’t be seeing any public service announcements about concussions, during the game…

Roger Goodell   PAPA JOHNSJohn Shnatter and Peyton Manning

There is a Special Place In Hell reserved for Shepherdsville Kentucky’s classy Mayor Scott Ellis who admitted to soliciting & receiving sex in return for helping parolees, but defiantly refused to resign. “I needed a blowjob” said Hiz Honor. His partners in crime, Bullitt County Sheriff’s Office  fired Detective Lynn Hunt after she uncovered enough evidence to arrest Ellis. Special Prosecutor Mark Shouse “went where the evidence took me” – NOT. The Good Ole’ Boys Club is alive and well in Shepherdsville Kentucky Y’All! Joining Ellis in hell is anti-abortion rights activist and sweet little old lady, Pat Lohman who secretly bought abortion clinics and lured in poor and vulnerable clients who thought they were Pro-Choice. Once there, potential clients were struck by the wrath of god and persuaded not to have an abortion. See the link to Petula Dvorak‘s article in the Washington Post, below. Am willing to bet my life that Pat Lohman would be horrified if you suggested that she take financial care of all of the poor babies she forces into this world. Hallelujah and pass the poverty!

Scott Ellis    Dvorak__1331454537890

Hell-bound too is Martin Shkreli, the Wall Street PharmaScum appeared before a congressional committee this week and smirked his way through the hearing about pharmaceutical price gouging and his companies Valeant Pharmaceuticals International Inc. and Turing Pharmaceuticals AG.  Of course Shkreli invoked the Fifth.  He later tweeted that committee-members were imbeciles. It is comforting to know that this scumbag will probably be convicted on unrelated federal fraud charges. Dare I suggest that Shkreli is a text-book narcissistic sociopath-which describes so many on Wall Street. Am sure his bravado will quickly fade in the general prison population with his new boyfriends…

Martin Shkreli AP_martin_shkreli_as_04_160204_4x3_992

Am nursing a migraine after discussing all of this buffoonery. There is never a shortage of Inductees, on the contrary too many and too little space.

PLEASE tweet me your suggestions for future Inductees into the Rectal Cranial Impaction Hall of Fame… Your input is invaluable! And Keep The Flag Flying @MissMyrtle2

Many Thanks to The Looney Tunes Show, Political Cartoonist Varvel, @NYDailyNews  Elizabeth McSheffrey @NatObserver @emcsheff  http://www.savethegreatbear.org/region/first_nations, Petula Devorak @petulad @washingtonpost http://wpo.st/HAS91 @RawStory

 

 

The Rise and Fall of Canada’s Fourth Reich Part 2: Canada’s Long National Nightmare…

The Rise and Fall of Canada’s Fourth Reich Part 2: Canada’s Long National Nightmare

Harper Nude by Margaret Sutherland

And so the Election Writ has been dropped…early. In yet another opportunistic and cynical middle finger salute to Canadians, Stephen Harper has called for a longer election campaign designed to further bankrupt the country and put opposition parties in dire financial straits.

Dearies, the Greatest Prime Minister Canada Never Had, former UN Ambassador humanitarian, HIV/AIDS advocate and National Treasure, Stephen Lewis eloquently spoke for us all when he said:

Somewhere in my soul, I cherish the possibility of a return to a vibrant democracy where equality is the watchword, where policy is debated rather than demeaned, where the great issues of the day are given thoughtful consideration, where Canada’s place on the World stage is seen as principled and laudatory, where human rights for all is the emblem of a decent and civilized society…

Harper Ukraine  Harpers In India Harper G7 Remember Me Harper and Pope Cartoon Mike De Adder

Scorched Earth: For the past year or two, Stephen Harper has pretty much prorogued Parliament and spent much of his time abroad, where he receives a far warmer welcome than he does in Canadian communities. Staging cheesy photo-ops in Ukraine, Afghanistan, Iraq, Kuwait, India, France, Belgium, Poland and The Vatican was the order of the day

Harper Emperor    Tom Mulcair2  Justin Trudeau  Elizabeth May

Dear Leader has avoided having to answer those pesky questions about a tanking economy, healthcare cuts, and other thorny political issues. He has also been busy evening the score with Old Enemies. In his sociopathic mind ANYONE who is not for him – Is Against Him, and therefore on the Enemies List. This list includes everyone from The Supreme Court of Canada, his political opponents the NDP’s Thomas Mulcair, the Liberal’s Justin Trudeau, Green Party Leader Elizabeth May, Women, Teachers, Scientists (#MuzzledScience),  Unions and Journaliststo the First Nations, Metis and Inuit communities, Non-Profits and saddest of all…The Canadian People

Harper Hugs Baird  peter-mackay-wears-no-compromise-pro-gun-t-shirt  James Moore

The Night of the Long Knives: In the past 6-8 months, we have seen the defection of Harper’s closest cronies.  Foreign Affairs Minister John Baird screwed up Canadian Al Jazeera journalist Mohamed Fahmy’s release from an Egyptian prison, mollified Vladmir Putin, and has since gone to work for a rapacious mining company and a former Aussie Prime Minister, attempting to clean up UN agencies…forgive me if I puke here. The ultimate flyweight ex-Defense and current InJustice Minister Peter MacKay, is not running, in order to “spend more time with his family”. Industry Minister James Moore has also chosen “to spend more time” with wife and child after facing a firestorm over his sexting/extramarital affair RideMeWilfredGate.

Christian Paradis  Shelly Glover  Eve Adams and Trudeau

Christian Paradis the International Development Minister decamped, just as the magnitude of Canada’s trade deficits and growing recession became obvious to everyone except the Conservatives. Canadian Heritage and Official Languages Minister Shelly Glover stepped down, just before those horrific propaganda adds about Canada’s Arctic and the tragic Franklin Expedition began jamming the airwaves . Eve Adams defected to the Liberal Party (where, karmically, she lost her nomination!) but methinks she and former Conservative Party apparatchik and pimp Dimitri Soudas, are merely moles. So much for Conservative Family Values and commitment to this country, in its hour of need.

Harper Dropping Writ Toon MacKay  Nunavut Dump  MMIW

The Conservative War Coffers are bulging at the seams with taxpayer monies that they have illegally clawed back from social programs and the sale of stocks and other liquid cash holdings…THAT BELONG TO THE CANADIAN PEOPLE-NOT THE HARPER CONS. Stephen Harper and the Conservative Party of Canada are in essence BUYING THE CANADIAN ELECTION on the backs of Canadian families, our children, our Veterans, Murdered and Missing Indigenous Women (#MMIW), and on and on. (please see Part 1 of The Rise and Fall of Canada’s Fourth Reich)

Canadas Economic Action Plan Penises  Harper Sinking Ship Joe Oliver  Harper Pie For Everyone Toon  David Parkins Harper Vote Buying Scandal UCCB

Sucker-Punching Canadians With Their Own Money: In the weeks preceding the Writ being dropped, Harper and the Conservative Caucus fanned out across the country, in what is without doubt the most cynical, opportunistic orchestrated case of outright vote-buying in the Free World. More than 1 billion dollars in “giveaways” TO taxpayers, with their own money, was distributed  by Cabinet Ministers, with the same callousness of Marie Antoinette’s famed (and disputed) “Let them eat cake”. We all know how well that ended for Ms. Antoinette…but I digress.

Lies Herr Harper Told Me

Hitler and Leni Reifenstahl Harper and Jenni Byrne  Harper and Pierre Poilievre Joe Oliver Mad Hatter

Adolf Hitler worked closely with propaganda filmmaker extraordinaire Leni Riefenstahl. Stephen Harper and Jenni Byrne often make the Josef Goebbels and Third Reich propaganda machine look like pikers…but the premise is always the same. The Bigger the Lie, the easier it is to believe: The viciousness of the never-ending tax-payer funded TV attack ads is breath-taking. Harper propagandist-in-short-pants Pierre Poilievre, gushed that the Universal Childcare Credit Benefit (UCCB) that rolled out on July 30 was “Christmas in July for Canadian families”. Joe Oliver’s April Budget was an out and out LIE…sugar-coated in moonbeams and unicorns. In a floundering economy where the Loonie neared 70 cents to the US Dollar today, it most certainly IS NOT Xmas in July for Canadians.

Leona Aglukkaq Harper Franklin Expedition  Polar Bears Caribou

NO, Herr Harper Handmaiden, Environment Minister Leona Aglukkaq, Canada’s Arctic – its Peoples and wildlife are NOT safe from the ravages of Climate Change, Vladmir Putin or Conservative Party machinations! PM Harper’s new interest in history by creating lushly expensive Franklin Expedition ads (but cutting funding for the CBC whose documentarians could have done a better job) is ironic, given the fact that he is re-writing the history books as the most corrupt, paranoid and dishonest Canadian PM ever.  And YES, the Tar Sands Miracle has totally evaporated…And NO, Mr. Prime Minister, it is NOT Albertans Fault!

Truth and Reconciliation Toon De Adder Murray Sinclair  Valcourt_Mulcair-large-800x450

The Truth and Reconciliation Commission initiative earlier this year, said so much about Stephen Harper on several levels. Aboriginal Affairs Minister Bernard Valcourt, made me ashamed to be Canadian when he sat through a standing ovation for Supreme Court Justice Murray Sinclair’s moving speech about the importance of All Canadians learning from the National Shame that was the Residential School Scandal, its impact on society, and moving forward in a spirit of mutual respect and cooperation.

Harper Ramadan Meal at 24 Sussex  Mother Canada with UCCB Cheque  Veterans Slush Fund

Gone are the days when Pandering was a crime. In fact, Herr Harper and His Henchmen have perfected the art of pandering to EVERY relevant major voting block out there. Why just this year Dearies, he hosted a post-Ramadan feast at Sussex Drive FOR THE FIRST TIME. He offered financial support to a questionable monument on Cape Breton Island. Intended to honour those who served and died overseas. Mother Canada is offensively tasteless, as the Guardian puts it…as the same Stephen Harper continues to disrespect Canadian troops and Veterans by denying them benefits and services, and raiding their funding to “Balance The Budget”. Until he needs a cheesy staged photo-op, that is. This Prime Minister Know No Shame!

Harper Jesus  Harper Big Leader is Watching You  Harper Fear Harper Democracy Toon de Adder

And because there is only ONE person who can save Canadians from ourselves…. Stephen Harper, affectionately christened CPC Jesus by Vancouver Conservative MP Wai Young, has shut down any national or parliamentary debate about National Security, and rammed through Bill C-51. Surprisingly enough, Justin Trudeau supported the Bill. Thomas Mulcair and Elizabeth May did not. Now don’t get  me wrong Dearies, it is not that Canada doesn’t need a National Security Bill. It’s just that this Bill is so draconian in the way it has been deviously written. The implications of far-reaching secret security services stripping the democratic rights of everyday Canadians with NO recourse for citizens, is disturbing in the extreme. To say that Bill C-51 is perverse and an abomination, is an understatement.

Perhaps the greatest part of this Greek Tragedy is, that as much as we Canadians hate Stephen Harper, (and remember, Canadians rarely HATE their elected leaders we – dislike them, disapprove of them, are disappointed in them) Stephen Harper, who will do and say ANYTHING to cling to power…hates us even more.

electionfraud-600

When will Canada’s Long National Nightmare end? October 19 cannot come soon enough… It is your duty as a Canadian to register your displeasure at the ballot box, that last bastion of Canadian Democracy!! Your failure to Vote, essentially means that Fascism wins..

Many Thanks to Kingston Artist Margaret Sutherland, for her brilliant portrait of the Emperor With No Clothes.

I would like to thank the following political cartoonists for their incredible ability to capture the current Canadian political and social climate. In many ways,  cartoonists have become the voice and the conscience of Canadians everywhere…because a picture is indeed worth a thousand words:

  • Michael de Adder
  • Brian Gable
  • Victor Juhasz
  • Graeme MacKay
  • Bruce MacKinnon
  • Theo Moudakis
  • David Parkins
  • Greg Perry

Apologies for any acknowledgment omissions.

The Rise and Fall of Canada’s Fourth Reich

Harper Netanyahu

Dearies, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper is the country’s most reviled leader since…well, forever. He has dragged this once proud nation down through the mud, pitting Canadians against one another.

It is with a heavy heart that I write my thoughts here. I do not take this lightly…

In Franklin Shaffer’s 1978 thriller The Boys From Brazil, based on the Ira Levin novel, “Dr. Josef Mengele (Gregory Peck) clones Hitler 95 times, and hopes to raise the resulting boys in Brazil, giving them childhoods identical to Hitler’s. His ultimate plan is to create a band of Nazi leaders that can continue where Hitler left off, forming the Fourth Reich”. He then sends them out into the World, to be activated in the future. He is pursued by aging Nazi Hunter Sir Laurence Olivier.

Bear with me here, Dearies. My theory is that Stephen Harper is indeed one of those very boys… metaphysically speaking.

Preston Manning   Brian Mulroney & Reagan

Stephen Harper has overseen the final transformation of the far right-wing evangelical Alberta Alliance Party into the most corrupt iteration of the once proud Conservative Party of Canada (as if that were possible, after Brian Mulroney).  He has outdone even the Godfather, Preston Manning. Any comparisons to the GOP Tea Party and its minions, are well-earned. It is almost as if they were functioning by the same play book.

Veterans Slush Fund    MMIW   Leona Aglukkaq

From cutting Veterans Benefits – THIS IS CANADA’S SHAME,  to saying in a nationally televised interview, that 1,200 Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women (#MMIW) are not really on his radar-THIS IS CANADA’S SHAME! To Inuit seniors being reduced to scavenging for food in dumpsters, while Herr Harper’s handmaiden and House Eskimo Nunavut Minister Leona Aglukkaq sulks behind a newspaper in Parliament – THIS IS CANADA’S SHAME! To denying needy Veteran’s medical and pension claims and forcing them to PROVE that they have lost limbs, every three years… and on and on and on, ad nauseam. It does not get more shameful than this.

Stephen Harper has pretty much prorogued Parliament since he first became Prime Minister. He has shut down parliamentary and national debate at every level… so much for Democracy. At the very same time he has revved up a Goebbels-like propaganda machine, the likes of which this country has never seen.

Harper  Nunavut Dump  Polar Bears

At the expense of the Canadian Taxpayer he has stage-managed his very own Nuremberg Rallies, The Conservative Party of Canada version is constantly staged photo ops with military personnel – while cynically denying them benefits and aid. More photo ops in the North, a smiling Harper in traditional parka, avoids the still smoldering Nunavut Trash Dump and melting icecaps where polar bears are the canary in that coalmine.

The virtual Nuremberg Rallies take place on social media, because after all, the Conservatives are nothing if not social media savvy. Citizenship and Immigration Canada touting “economic workers” and fast-tracking “economic immigrants” with $$$ is beyond cynical. It translates into either offshore buyers mainly from Asia and South Asia who scoop up expensive real estate in Vancouver and Toronto and do NOT become residents… to poor workers coming to low-paying jobs that are in essence taking those same low-paying jobs away from Canadians. It doesn’t get more cynical than this.

Canadas Economic Action Plan Penises  Immigration Canada  Caribou Mark Carney

Oh wait a moment, yes it does Dearies. Canada’s Economic Action Plan is bombarding the airwaves. As real put-food on the table and a roof-over-your-head jobs disappear, the Tar Sands miracle evaporates, and the Loonie plummets – The Conservatives and Harper would have us believe that we never had it so good. The Canadian Economy continues to tank, and the first sign of that was a subtle one methinks – Former Governor of the Bank of Canada Mark Carney deserts the sinking ship to sail to Old Blighty and become Governor of the Bank of England.

There is indeed a sucker born every minute. And Canadians have to be some of the biggest suckers in the world. Somebody keeps voting Herr Harper and his henchmen into power, and it sure as hell isn’t me…

Harper Hugs Baird peter-mackay-wears-no-compromise-pro-gun-t-shirt  Julian Fantino Rob and Doug Ford

You are often judged by the company you keep. As Canada’s Commander-in-Chief, Stephen Harper helped create such monstrous buffoons as former Toronto Mayor Rob Ford ( and big bro Doug). This drug-addicted trash-talking mayor of Canada’s largest city made it and the country the punchline of late-night comedy jokes. Former Foreign Affairs Minister John Baird failed to secure the release of Canadian journalist Mohamed Fahmy from an Egyptian jail, mollified Vladmir Putin and then jumped ship when the going got rough. Former Defence and now Minister of Injustice Peter MacKay is a gun activist and flyweight supreme. Former Veterans Affairs Minister Julian Fantino insulted Veterans and cut their hard-won  benefits, Former Health and now Environment Minister Leona Aglukkaq is virtually overseeing the genocide of her own People: seniors and others starving, astronomical youth suicide rates and ironically enough as “Environment” Minister, the melting of the Arctic.

Patrick Brazeau  Idle No More   temporary-shelter-in-attawapiskat (1)

Oh yes, we cannot forget former patronage appointee Conservative Senator Patrick Brazeau, abuser of women, who now runs a strip club steps away from Parliament Hill. Adding to Canada’s international shame is the determined effort of the Harper Cons to scrap First Nations consultations and negotiations while ramming through pipelines and tanker ports. Not to mention keeping First Nations and Metis peoples living in Third World Conditions… Atawapiskat amongst others is the poster-child for genocide by a thousand cuts

goebbels  pierre poilievre   CBC  Mansbridge

The Harper version of The Night of the Long Knives has been to muzzle the press and character assassinate anyone and I do mean ANYONE who speaks out against him. The once proud CBC has been co-opted to act as the Conservative Party PR machine. Propaganda Minister Pierre Poilievre is casting his taxpayer-funded vanity ad net everywhere, and Nightly News anchor Peter Mansbridge fits right in. Is it just me Dearies, or do they bear a startling resemblance to Josef Goebbels? But I digress…

Mike Duffy  IMG_4959.JPG.jpeg

Wait, what light through yonder window breaks? ‘Tis Mike Duffy and the Senate Scandal, and “Anti-Terror” Bill C-51. How  ironic is it that an old CBC hack and blowhard may issue the first crack in the Conservative Party warship hull. And speaking of war, Herr Harper has stricken fear in the hearts of Canadians – fear of “terrorists”, fear of one another. Of course he is the only one capable of saving us from ourselves and the Democracy that my father and grandfather fought for…ergo Bill C-51.

Harpers With Cats

So Dearies, methinks there is just no getting around making comparisons to the last days of The Third Reich, and the twilight of the Alliance/Conservative Party of Canada. Laureen Harper, that Stepford First Lady, plays Eva to her husband’s Fuehrer. They are both hunkered down in the Bunker…that metapyhisical closet,  surrounded by sycophants.

If ever there was a time for the Forces of Good to rise up against the Forces of Evil, the time is now. If Canadians fail to excercise their franchise, they will continue to struggle in The Darkness that they have earned.

This cannot end well for Harper and the “Conservative” Party..but the damage they have done to Canada is irreparable. And for that…THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED!