Tag: Dmitry Medvedev

Miss Myrtle’s Rectal Cranial Impaction Hall of Fame Part 9 – Update

Illegitimi non carborundum – Don’t Let the Bastards Grind You Down

Here for your edification and enjoyment are yet more Inductees into the Rectal Cranial Impaction Hall of Fame. These are the folks who leave us dumbfounded, dumbstruck and dumbfucked, in no particular order:

DISCLAIMERS: Any picture/Inductee duplication is purely intentional. You may also notice that the majority of Inductees are men. Dearies, that should require no further explanation. This blog post includes text and photos…because a picture is worth a thousand words.

SPECIAL THANKS to Colonel Morris Davis, former Guantanamo Chief Prosecutor for creating the phrase Rectal Cranial Impaction

twitter-logo

F**K TWITTER! Part 2

Since taking out my frustrations about constantly being suspended after strong anti- Vladimir Putin tweets in a blog-post on October 5, 2016, much has happened. https://missmyrtle2.wordpress.com/2016/10/05/miss-myrtles-rectal-cranial-impaction-hall-of-fame-part-9/.

Just before Halloween of that year, posted the following tweet with this pic of Putin and the comment “Sometimes It Just Sucks Being #vladimirputin #EverydayVampireProblems”

Putin Dracula Robin Lawson

Immediately my Twitter account was suspended again – this time for over 72 hours.

On October 19, 2016 – two weeks prior to this account lock, had concluded that Twitter (Canada) had a serious security issue: Russia. Never received any replies to my frantic requests that a real person contact me, not just a Twitter bot. I reached out to a business acquaintance high up at Google. He immediately connected me directly with the new Managing Director of Twitter Canada. Rory Capern has since mysteriously left the company. We talked via phone and emailed the week of October 19.

Capern connected me to his Director of Content, Christopher Doyle and his tech team. All of them had me answer many questions and ignored my responses and my clearly listed concerns. They inferred I was wearing a tin-foil hat. On October 21, the big East Coast Denial of Service (DDoS) Bot-Net hack occurred, affecting access to websites, social media, hundreds of corporations, infrastructure service providers, government agencies and others.

After the Halloween 2016 account lock-out, had multiple suspensions, well into the Spring of 2017. Had been tweeting relentlessly about the Syrian Genocide and the roles that monsters Putin and Assad were playing in it. Tweeted about Putin planning to invade Ukraine after annexing Crimea, and co-opting Netanyahu in Israel and Erdogan in Turkey. Included Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov and Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev in some of those tweets. Also Putin Puppet General Mike Flynn. Used hashtags like #BackToTheGulag and #MakeRussiaGreatAgain

Always got the same automated response from Twitter:

Hello,

Your account is now unlocked, and we’re sorry for the inconvenience.

Twitter has automated systems that find and remove automated spam accounts and it looks like your account got caught up in one of these spam groups by mistake. This sometimes happens when an account exhibits automated behavior in violation of the Twitter Rules (https://twitter.com/rules).

Again, we apologize for the inconvenience. Please do not respond to this email as replies will not be monitored.

Thanks,

Twitter Support

My account was NEVER unlocked after receiving those messages. I had to bombard Rory Capern and Christopher Doyle with emails (to which they never responded), until 4 -7 days later, my account would finally be unlocked.

I lost over 5,000 REAL Followers as a result of the constant account suspensions (part of the hack attack) and have never been able to regain them, or rebuild that momentum. After Spring 2017 the account locks stopped. Maybe Twitter FINALLY improved its cyber security efforts.

In February and April of 2017, I posted Mike Luckovich cartoons re Putin, Trump, the GOP and James Comey: My account was locked soon after both times:

DT Putin In Bed Toon Mike Luckovich  DT Putin Comey I need Loyalty ML June 2017

Kept a running riff going on the Boris and Natasha TV cartoon characters in the much-beloved Rocky and Bullwinkle Show.  Made Putin Fearless Leader, Melania Natasha Fatale, and Trump Boris Badenov. Was often shut down after tweeting them:

Boris&Natasha Screw Amerika:
Putin: My Evil Plan is Working Bwahaha
Melania: #FlynnLies #PenceLied
Trump: And #Snowdon’s tied up with a bow

Boris and Natasha1           Boris Badenov NoGoodNik

My biggest concern is that Putin, in addition to weaponizing social media to spread dezinformatsiya – Fake News and cause global chaos, is also shutting down critics NOT just in Russia, but around the World. Miss Myrtle is just a tiny fish, caught up in a gigantic  Russian Bot algorithmic cyber net.

Twitter Canada, Facebook Canada and other social media platforms in this country, have NEVER been held to account for their failure to protect users from Russian bots not just spreading Fake News, but also stealing their private and financial information. Our CRTC (The Canadian Radio Television and Telecommunications Commission is a regulatory agency for broadcasting and telecommunications) per usual, it has its head in the sand. Wake Up Canada!

At least the House and Senate committees are looking into this situation. No matter how hard the Republicans try to obstruct the work being done, am hopeful the truth will prevail here.

This situation is also related to the recent Kremlinesque Trump Administration attack on Net Neutrality. Trump appointee Ajit Pai has gutted the FCC ( Federal Communications Commission, an independent agency of the US government created by statute to regulate interstate communications by radio, television, wire, satellite, and cable). He reversed consumer internet protections. It has been confirmed that during the Public Commentary period on the FCC’s website, over 1 MILLION Russian-based bots swarmed the comments page.

Shutting down Freedom of Speech and the freedom to choose the news and other content that you consume, is what Putin and other dictators do. It allows him to spread his propaganda 24/7/365 and consolidate his power. He has run basically unopposed in the current Russian “election” and will be elected Czar For Life. If that isn’t Back To The Gulag, what is…

This discussion is far from over. Putin’s megalomaniacal plan to destroy America from within, affects us all. It affects Canada even more so, given our geography and our history. We live in perilous times, and the young entrepreneurs, the Jack Dorseys and Mark Zuckerbergs of Silicon Valley, never dreamed in a million years that their innovative platforms for social communication would ever be weaponized to perpetrate evil on a global scale.

We cannot and must not let Putin’s Useful Idiot, Donald Trump succeed. The battlefield has changed, but we must acknowledge that We Are At War.

To be continued…

*** Please share your Twitter – Russian Bot experiences @missmyrtle2***

 

Where are Batman and Robin When You Really Need Them? In Honor of Batman Day 2019, Here Is A 2017 Blog Post

Batman Robin and Villains

Have been feeling a bit depressed, irritable and overwhelmed lately, truth be told. Haven’t You?

The World is going to Hell in a Basket of Deplorables. The 2016 Armageddon Election that installed a Traitor, Brexit, terrorist attacks, the Parkland School and New Zealand Mosque Shootings, Putin, Xi, MBS, North Korea, Syria, Palestine, Yemen, South Sudan, Ukraine, Crimea invasions, bombings, floods, earthquakes, forest fires, teachers strikes, drone strikes, melting glaciers, doomed species, political gridlock and enmity, cancer, suicide, death and destruction: The list goes on and on and on…It’s in our faces 24/7/365.

While listlessly draped on the sofa watching TV, quite by accident, flipped onto an old episode of Batman. Holy Bat Cave!!!

BatCave Adam-West-Batman-Burt-Ward-Robin-Batcave

Laughed so hard for the next half hour, at the beautiful uncomplicated silliness of it all, and also cried for the sheer joy of remembering a kinder, gentler time. As a kid, never ever missed a single original show, and the absurdly wonderful humor is even funnier today, than it was then.

So many thoughts and memories: The Villains. Who can forget The Joker, Catwoman, The Penguin and The Riddler?  Their dastardly evil plots were quite benign by today’s standards. The sheer joy with which Cesar Romero, Eartha Kitt,  Julie Newmar, Burgess Meredith, Frank Gorshin and others played their roles, was not lost on us kids. No scenery was left unchewed, no cliché held sacred…KAPOW!!!

Eartha Kitt Caesar Romero Batman Catwoman  Batman the Joker Pie

The sets were absurdly simple and whimsical. Yes, they had a sense of whimsy without cutting-edge technology getting in the way. The props were hysterical. From the looks of the old TV episodes, it must have cost $50 to make a show, excluding actors salaries (which by today’s standards would be absurdly low). That includes costumes and make-up. The wonderful cheesieness of it all, enhanced the shared experience. WE HAD TO USE OUR IMAGINATIONS.

Reminds me of the early Dr. Who and the TARDIS/Phone box from Britain’s BBC. The austere rough-hewn simplicity and boundless fun of its earlier incarnation was equally and wonderfully cheesy. These were after all, the same folks who brought us Bill and Ben the Flowerpot Men.

DoctorWho_Hartnell_2741758k Bill and Ben The Flowerpot Men

The sheer darkness and introspection of what followed, the Big Screen versions of Batman and Robin, have to a large degree mirrored the ever darkening lens of world events. Early magical Super Heroes like Adam West and Burt Ward, have been supplanted by the likes of Michael Keaton, Christian Bale and Robert Downey Jr., worthy actors in their own right, commanding a larger, brooding stage.

michael-keaton Batman  christian-bale Batman

The gazillion dollar budgets for each new Batman movie and its Super Hero cousins, become more obscene with every film. These budgets could lift several Third World countries out of poverty permanently. But I digress…

The witty repartee flew fast and furious with each Batman TV episode. Even as kids, we knew it was funny and as  an adult, it is even funnier.

Thelonious Armstrong compiled a list of some of “Adam West’s Funniest Quotes as Batman”. Here are a few of them. You probably have a favorite. It’s amazing how they relate to today’s global Gotham…

Batman POW 2Batman SPLATT!

1. “It’s obvious. Only a criminal would disguise himself as a licensed, bonded guard yet callously park in front of a fire hydrant.”  Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin need to be tied to fire hydrants and forced to watch old Batman TV episodes.

 2. We’ve come a long way from the Prime Minister’s exploding cake. Or have we?” Actually Dear Hearts,  we are not even close. Political  character assassinations have become a way of life. In some ways, Mitch McConnell has become the Martha Stewart of exploding cake…

Mitch McConnell Cake Photo

3. “A reporter’s lot is not easy, making exciting stories out of plain, average, ordinary people like Robin and me.” As Comrade Trump and Fox News never tire of telling us, media needs grist for its never-ending 24/7 mill. As Vladimir Putin’s minions at RT would tell you, hacking makes it a hell of a lot easier.

4. Robin: “You can’t get away from Batman that easy!”

Batman: “Easily.”

Robin: “Easily.”

Batman: “Good grammar is essential, Robin.”

Robin: “Thank you.”

Batman: “You’re welcome.”

Batman and Robin 2

Never has there been a greater need for both civility, and good grammar. Bigly! Canadian, American and European politicians are constantly breaking new ground in nastiness. In the Ukraine, they have all-out brawls. But No One has destroyed civility and good grammar with greater zeal and success, than the Traitor-In-Chief, Fake President Trump. Because he is a Very Stable Genius…

Ukraine Parliament 1  President Trump Holds Rally In Phoenix, Arizona

5. “Yes, he moves very quickly for an overstuffed and unlikely Egyptian Pharaoh”  THIS is my new go-to description for Don the Con… with apologies to the late Victor Buono.

Batman Pharoah

6. Robin: “Let’s go!”

Batman: “Not you, Robin. They have strict licensing laws in this country. A boy of your age is not allowed in a drinking tavern.” Haven’t been in a ‘drinking tavern’ in years. Have left all that to Brett Kavanaugh. Funny how in the US you can do your grocery shopping and buy all the alcohol you need at the same time. Here in Cantada, well British Columbia to be exact, we have to go to the government liquor store to buy  champers and single malt whisky. But I digress…

Batman Robin in a Bar

7. Batman “Catwoman, I find you to be odious, abhorrent, and insegrievious.” Don’t know about you, but I just adore that word insegrievious. Am going to make it my word of the month. And how anyone could find the delectable Julie Newmar odious, is beyond me.

Catwoman Batman Insegrevious

8. “Robin: Where’d you get a live fish, Batman?”

Batman: “The true crime fighter always carries everything he needs in his utility belt, Robin.” Am firmly convinced that this is the perfect metaphor for Hero Robert Swan Mueller…

Batman Words 3 Mueller Its Mueller Time Meme

9.  “It is the duty of every good citizen of Gotham City to report meeting a man from Mars in a public park”. Will keep this in mind while watching jailbird George Papadopoulos lie his way through more TV interviews, or during the next wave of Border Patrol and ICE putting more Children In Cages in Trump Concentration Camps, as “illegal immigrants”.

10.   “No, Robin. With my head sticking out of this neosaurus costume, I might not appear like an ordinary, run of the mill crime fighter.”  Said Trumpanzee Alex Jones, to no one in particular – EVER.

Alex Jones Frog

11. .“Bartender, a bit of advice. Always inspect a jukebox carefully. These machines can be deadly.”  This ad hominem always worked well for Brett Kavanaugh, and in various pubs in Northern Ireland.

12. “Let that be a lesson. In future, be more careful from who you accept free lemonade.”  Dear Trumpanzees and Trump Base, Batman was speaking to you!

Batman Robin Lemonade

13.  (after coming through Barbara’s window): “We would have entered the building by more conventional means, but we didn’t want to startle the tenants.”  Am certain this was meant as a cautionary tale re Vladimir Putin and his army of Russian hackers.

Batman Robin Climbing Bldg

All thanks to the Original Guys in Tights, those fearless and pithy crime fighters, The Caped Crusader and Robin.

They weren’t slick or technologically advanced. They just got the job done, and always saved the day. They brought us joy and laughter. Raising a dram to Adam West who will forever be my Batman, Burt Ward who played Robin, Alan Napier, who played  Alfred Pennyworth, and the rest of the glorious cast of unforgettable characters, May the Road Always Rise Up to Meet You!

Alfred Batman Robin in Batcave